My mother sent me one of those emails that makes  its way around the planet.  It had sort of a fun with words theme including this fun list of homonyms.  I’d give credit to its creator, but being that it was in one of those emails, who knows who that was.

The bandage was wound around the wound.

The farm was used to produce produce.

The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.

We must polish the Polish furniture.

He could lead if he would get the lead out.

The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.

Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.

A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.

When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes. I did not object to the object.

The insurance was invalid for the invalid.

There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.

They were too close to the door to close it.

The buck does funny things when the does are present.

A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.

To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.

The wind was too strong to wind the sail.

Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.

I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.

How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?

Homonyms can be really annoying if you edit like I do.  When my kindle reads my books back to me, it will always pronounce tear as what rolls down your cheek.  So if she tears a paper, it sounds like she’s crying on it, not ripping it apart.  It does the same with wind.  They drive up a winding driveway, one with curves going up a hill, but instead it wound like it’s a windy driveway.  It does the sound with wound.  Miss Kindle always says it like an injury.  Another on isn’t on this list, that’s lives.  She always says it like a cat has nine lives.  Here’s my sentence for that one, plus another common Kindle word.

The cat with nine lives lives on Smith Street.

I’d read that book, but I already read it.

-Jennifer